Doctors

I went to the doctor yesterday and I really hate going to the doctor. Half of it is the normal "I don't wanna go to the doctor" feeling that diminishes many of us to roughly the personality equivalent of a 4-year old the instant we walk into a doctor's office. (It's also the likely cause of my high blood pressure at the beginning of every appointment). But the other half of why I don't like going to the doctor is that, in general, I dislike the actual doctors. And I should preface this by saying that my close friends who have become doctors are exempted from the stark generalization I am about to make. You all, thank goodness, have maintained the kindness and generous spirits that made me love you in the first place. The rest of the doctor world, listen up: it's the "doctor attitude" that really irks me. That way that doctors (and again, I'm being hugely general here) have of looking down at you, of holding this "ooh look at me, I went to medical school, I'm so smart" nonsense over your head, that holier than thou attitude.... it really irritates the crap out of me. I'm pretty sure they brainwash it into these people in medical school, too. I have seen so many seemingly nice, normal, civilized people enter medical school and come out with this M.D. complex, it makes me want to go to medical school just to find out what it is that they tell these pre-doctors that makes them develop such a big head!! Actually no. I'm not sure there is enough money (or pretty shoes!) in the world to make me want to go to medical school.

Anyway, I had to go to the doctor yesterday. And my last experience with a doctor was so bad that I just prefaced my entire appointment with "Look, I really hate going to the doctor, I've been treated very poorly in the past and I'm only here because you came very highly recommended."

And actually, my doctor was really nice. She was honest with me and didn't speak down to me or use big words that she didn't even understand just to make herself sound smart. It was not awful. And now, I can go back to her with all of my real ailments and find out what I need to do to fix myself and live to see age 50. :)

My only complaint: my tetnus shot was overdue. I remember screaming like I was having my hand cut off when I had to get this shot as a youth. Why I wept so overzealously as a child over the actual needle, I do not know--it's tiny! It's the vaccine itself you should worry about. Damn, does my arm hurt. It has gotten progressively worse since yesterday. The nurses warned me that my arm might hurt for a few weeks (and yes, they did say weeks), but I didn't really believe them. I thought, well the vaccine might burn or the needle might be as wide as a Starbucks Frappaccino straw, but will my arm hurt for weeks? No way.

I'm here to tell you: Way. Damn. I'm obviously a total wus that should never have any actual children of my own; I would never survive even the thought of labor. But at least I won't get lockjaw anytime in the next decade!