The Grating Incident

I am a very mobile talker. I think it stems from forcing myself to move around when I first started teaching. The very first classes I ever taught were 3.5 hours long each, and I found that if I didn't move around, I would actually get pretty bored from just standing up there and lecturing. So I made a conscious effort to walk around the classroom as I talked. I didn't do laps or anything, but I walk around a bit, pick up random things to use as props and demos, that kind of thing. Plus, it kept my students more alert and involved; it's always good when the teacher does not appear bored.

The downside to this is that this behavior has become kind of ingrained in the way I lecture. And now, I am finding, I do the same thing when I am giving a talk or a seminar. I have always been one to dress up nicely when giving a presentation unlike so very very many people in my field (see a previous article noting the acid washed denim man-capris), but now, in order to curb my excessive movement I make a concerted effort to wear rather high heels. The ones I wore at my last conference were a modest 4 inches.

But one should always check out the floor before stepping up to give a talk in high heels. At the conference I attended several weeks back, our meeting was in a large university lecture hall. It must have been used for chemistry or physics lecture at one point as the front of the room had a large table/bench. The floor also had the obligatory "Oops, I've spilled the 16-gallon tank of water I was using for my demo on the floor" grating in the middle of the floor as well. (I've never really known what those were for.) The grating was clearly secretly designed with a secondary purpose: to catch the heel of my shoe and grab hold for dear life. Here I am, giving my first talk at a conference, dressed in my suit and very awesome heels, being very conservative with my movement around the room, and then bam! The slender heel of my shoe has become one with the grating. And tripping over my own feet and falling flat on my face in front of an auditorium full of famous-ish people simply will not do. I tried gently lifting my foot, hoping the shoe would just slip free from the apparent bear trap that had been set up, but only managed to lift my foot out of the shoe almost entirely. Gingerly placing my foot back into the shoe (keep in mind, I am still giving my talk at this point), I gave it another shot, leaning my weight on the non-captive foot and giving the hostage shoe a little twist. Finally! I was free! I hightailed it to the other side of the speaking area, finished my talk, and did not go near that side of the room again.